Today I had the privilege of attending a conference where M. Gary Neuman was speaking. He has written many books, but his most recent is called, Connect to Love.
I’ve seen Neuman on Oprah a couple of times and didn’t want to miss this opportunity to hear what he had to say. He did not disappoint. His message is straight forward and very much needed in this day and age of over-scheduling and chronic distraction.
Connect to Love is based on his research with men and women. Among the findings is that women’s number one complaint is not having enough time with their spouses while men’s number one complaint is not having enough appreciation. Not surprising… Imagine what would happen if we combined the two and spent time with our partners each day telling them how much we appreciate them!
He also talks about the importance of emotional (and physical of course) fidelity, reminding us that when a person other than your partner is providing you that jolt of excitement, whether it be a passing comment or an animated conversation, it puts your relationship in danger.
From an energy point of view, this makes perfect sense. Energy builds within us throughout the day and sharing the little things that build up with your partner strengthens and feeds the connection between you. If someone else is your “go to” person, the relationship with them strengthens while your primary relationship atrophies.
I love it when I get to hear insights from someone who knows their stuff, and I can tell you that Neuman does. He’s doing a workshop for couples tonight (1/10/11) at Chaparral Suites for those of you who live in Phoenix and are looking for a breath of fresh air!